Nikki found another crack in Salina’s movie-watching history: the one, the only, “Captain Ron.” The best part? You picked it! (ICYMI: it was an Instagram poll, so don’t forget to follow @sweetteaandtv OR become a Patreon for these special opportunities!)
Did she love it, did she hate it? You gotta tune in to find out!
OH! And hang around for "Extra Sugar: Nautical or Knot?", where that "son of a gun" Salina takes us on a nautical "filibuster." This segment is "chock-a-block" full of a "Grits Blitz" challenge that had Nikki wondering if some of Salina's Nespresso advent calendar was "in the offing" for her.
After the episode, dig in for yourself if you’d like with these reads:
Come on, let’s get into it! Or, as Captain Ron would say, let’s kick the tires and light the fires, y’all!
Or listen on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts.
Transcript
Hey y'all, Nikki from the Future here before we get started with this last episode of Sweet Tea and TV season three, we wanted to let you know that we had a technical issue with this week's episode.
A huge shout out to my husband and the people of the internet for finding a fix so that we didn't lose everything.
But unfortunately, the audio does get splotchy in a couple of places.
It's super intermittent and it should only last a little bit.
But if you hear anything weird, that's what's up.
Thanks for your patience and as always, thank you for listening.
Enjoy.
Hey Salina, hey Nikki and hey, y'all, welcome to Sweet Tea and TV.
The season three special episode, we're calling it O Captain, my Captain Ron, where Salina watches one of my all time favorite movies, Captain Ron.
Then the style goes what she's excited.
So throughout the season, um of Sweet Tea and TV, this season and previous seasons, we circle around things as we're talking that we find out the other one hasn't seen before or hasn't seen in a long time or just like sort of cultural touchstones for each one of us that the other one might not have the same experience.
So this season, we had a couple that ended up on our list.
Um, Elma and Les Doc Hollywood and Captain Ron.
And after pulling the audience, I, I think it was the very fair vote.
In my opinion, we put it out there to the people and the people spoke and chose Captain Ron.
Do you think it was a fair vote?
Somewhere in my notes?
I have Nikki, you've seen, I've seen three times as many movies as you as you.
I'm sure of it because I'm an only child.
That's what we do.
OK.
Lots of a long time.
And yet somehow I've been Jedi mind tricked into doing the last two movie reviews.
Not a mind trick.
We let the people vote on this one.
This was not even, we made this one fair.
No, Machiavelli when you really trick someone, you lay the seeds early, you sow them early.
You know what I'm saying?
So you suggest the poll, you knew what you were doing.
Very more intelligent being.
I know yet somehow you knew, might I suggest a song called Mastermind by Taylor Swift.
Listen to that and then tell me what you think.
Anyhow.
Fairies and Squares.
Fair and Square, we pulled the people.
Uh I did vote on Instagram stories because it popped up.
So I voted.
But even after removing my vote, fairy and squares, it still was the winner it was still the clear, the clear winner.
The Decisive Victor was cap on.
This is what the people want.
Salina, we are just giving the people what they want.
That's right.
That's all it is.
So, I've seen this movie, I've seen this movie probably more than a, like more than 100 times.
Did you watch it again for this?
I did about three quarters of the way through.
I didn't get time to finish it completely, but I could relive it for you if you want right now.
I've seen it a million times.
We had it on um What is that called?
The predecessor to CD?
Si mean to DVD S the big giant laser disk.
We had it on laser disk.
I had it on, you had a laser disc player is like the most shocking thing of all only schools have them.
It's a thing.
Uh I think my step dad won it through a radio contest.
OK.
So we had it and a few other laser discs.
Um It was a superior product.
I'm told uh I don't know, maybe I don't, I don't really have super clear memories except we only had certain movies on it.
So we had certain movies there, certain movies on V H s and you just had to remember which one you had and get the player, right?
And there's always a billion buttons to push because you had to make sure the sound was coming out of the TV.
And that there was that on the Right Aux and it was just more, more than I can do, but we had it.
And so I've seen it a billion times.
So good.
You'll be our resident expert then.
I, I am a Captain run expert.
I am, I'm happy to, to frame myself as that and I feel confident.
I don't own very many things about myself, but I will own that.
I am an expert in captain run for better or for worse.
So let's find out does this 30 year old box office flop turned cult classic stand.
The test of time.
Did it make Salina giggle once or twice or did it Howard the duck her only time will tell.
Let's get into it.
So we get a little bit of an overview first for the people who haven't seen it and maybe aren't watching along quite yet.
Um I have two descriptions.
I'm going to share in the vein of Salina.
I'm gonna share an I M DB description and because I felt like it was fraught with judgment, I wrote my own description.
Ok, perfect.
A Chicagoan and this is I M DB A Chicagoan inherits an old yacht.
He, his wife, daughter and son, fly to a Caribbean Island and hire a dubious captain Ron to sail them on an adventure to Miami.
I felt like that dubious word cast a little more judgment on Captain Ron than I was comfortable with.
He's not dubious.
He's colorful.
He's quirky.
He's a man of the world.
He's Kurt Russell.
He's Kurt Russell.
That's really what it boils down to.
I think that's right.
So, my description is a middle aged man is lured from Wintry Chicago to the tropical Caribbean in hopes of reliving amazing childhood memories on a yacht.
He inherits upon his uncle's death.
A sketchy yacht broker sends out local Captain Ron to help the man and his family find their way to Miami, Miss Hap Madcap.
Mayhem and hilarity ensues.
I don't know that first one was really special.
That's good.
I didn't like how they didn't call it the yacht broker.
I feel like he really is the villain in all of this.
And instead they focused on the dubiousness of Captain Ron instead of the quirky colorfulness.
I just didn't like it.
Yeah, he's not dubious.
Take the reins.
He's not dubious.
Uh Either way anyway, any way you slice it, the movie starts in Chicago where we learn that Martin Harvey has inherited a boat from his uncle and is now trying to convince his wife that the family should go to El Crib and skipper the boat from the small island.
It's on San Palm Deter to Miami where they can sell it for a half a million dollars.
She's against it.
But when his daughter comes home with some big news, they jet off.
When they get to the Caribbean, the boat is not nearly in the shape they expected.
And when the yacht broker in Miami finds this out, he writes the family off and asks his assistant to send whoever she can find to help them get the boat to Miami.
You, Captain Ron, he's one eyed has a lot of weird worrying anecdotes.
Like he once sank his boss's boat off some big reef in Australia A K A, the Great Barrier Reef.
And he gets the family into a lot of trouble.
Certainly not on his own though because Martin and Katherine don't always help the situation, in my opinion.
Ultimately, the family gets robbed by pirates and set, set adrift without the captain, they float into Cuba, which at the time this movie takes place was not nearly uh it was not a particularly friendly place for Americans.
They rescue Captain Ron from captivity and they sail off for Miami.
However, when they arrive, they figure their adventure isn't quite over.
And while Captain Ron departs their lives physically, he remains in their hearts and souls forever as they sail off again.
I thought it was a feel good ending.
Yeah, I think, I think that's uh very accurate.
It's incredibly thorough.
I told you I could replay them that too, but like just also that it was a feel good ending, I think, really very accurate.
Yeah, for sure.
So I thought next um kind of doing the background of the movie, we could do a deep dive into the cast.
Um because I think there are some familiar faces like if you're an elder millennial, I feel like some of this cast was familiar to you.
And if it wasn't, when I explain who they are, I think it will be a little more familiar to you.
Um So we're gonna start with Catherine Harvey.
She is the wife in the movie and she's played by Mary Kay Place.
Um Mary Kay Place was in private Benjamin, which we discussed in the finale finale, Patreon exclusive Extra Sugar because I confused that movie for True, Beverly Hills.
Uh Oh OK.
Connecting dots.
A lot of folks might also recognize her as Pearl Smoother in Sweet Home Alabama.
Um Reese's mom, Reese Witherspoon's mom just saying that's a lot, that's a lot easier.
No, she was the husband's the ex-husband's mom.
This Jean Smart.
Oh, yeah, you're right.
Sorry, you're right, Rees's mom.
But hey, connections, it's all the same that there's, there's one more connection to sweet tea and TV.
Um The reason actually that we brought Captain Ron up at some point during the season is he was wondering if you're gonna remind me she's friends with Linda Bloodworth Thomason and they co-wrote on mash together.
Um So all roads lead back to Linda Bloodworth Thomason and sweet tea and TV.
That's true.
All of them, she's 75 years old today and she's from Tulsa Oklahoma.
Next up, we have Caroline Harvey who is the daughter, um, that's played by Meadow Sisto.
She had a few film and TV roles through the 90s and early oughts.
But she's probably best known for this role.
Wikipedia said that not me.
I didn't, I couldn't recognize her because, um, uh, the, the high school movie that was really popular that she did, um, had Jennifer Love Hewitt hardly.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Another movie.
I've seen 14 billion times.
Yeah.
So she's in that and like, I could not place her, even when I looked up her picture, I couldn't remember her part in the movie.
She plays the hippie chick.
It might be time for me to revisit this movie.
But the, the, uh, another touch point for Meadow Sisto is that her brother is Jeremy Sisto and he played the rich guy who's really into Cher and clueless his name is Elton.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, it's so funny because like, when I saw CSTO, I was like, wait a second, like, it's not exactly a popular name.
So I went and I was like, oh, it's his sister.
Yeah, this is obviously not about him, but he's also been other stuff like, um, six ft Under and Law and Order a Meadow is 50 years old today and she's originally from Grass Valley California, but she calls Portland Oregon home.
Next up is Benjamin Harvey.
He's played by Benjamin Salisbury.
He is 42 today and originally from Minneapolis, Minnesota, uh, this movie is obviously a major Touchstone for me when I think about his career.
But some other people might recognize him as Brighton Sheffield from the nanny.
So cute in that show I did, but he doesn't look the same to me.
Like, even as bright I didn't connect it.
I was like he looks really familiar and then I was like, oh, that's him.
Why does it look so different?
Interesting.
Which doesn't really make any sense.
I might be thinking about older Brighton.
And so since he was like a little kid.
Yeah.
Did you recognize him from D 3?
The Mighty Ducks?
I don't think I was in on D three.
Shut up.
Really?
Just the first and the second 1. D 3 is the one they go to the private school.
It's like Mighty Ducks is a series where I would die on the hill that it gets better.
Each movie I love the original D3 is probably my favorite.
Oh, I missed out.
Uh, this is cool since 2017.
Benjamin has been Universal Studios.
Hollywood's Director of Operations.
Oh, really?
Uh-huh.
Wow.
Isn't that like a cool and stressful job?
Yeah, that sounds stressful.
And it sounds perfect for a kid who grew up in movies, but maybe, probably, I guess at some point either fell out of love with movies or maybe the movies fell out of love with him.
It's hard to know for sure.
That's a pretty cool job.
Yeah.
So, I actually in my original list had preserved this next one for last because to me, Kurt Russell is a high point just in life in general.
Um, but we reordered a little bit because you have some things you wanted to share about Martin Short.
So we'll talk about Kurt Russell next.
Um I mean, I just think he's such a treasure.
So wonderful.
Um, he was born in 1951 making him about 72 today.
I had to do quite a bit of math to get there because I M DB, I think it was that he was 73 I was like, that's not possible if he was born in 1951.
I'm not good with math, but something was off with their numbers.
So I had to do my own math and I think where I figured out where his birthday falls and where this episode will air, let's just say he's about 72. Uh he was born in Springfield Massachusetts and he started acting at 12 years old.
Um, one of my favorite movies Overboard from 1987.
I love Overboard.
So it, it just didn't get the credit that it deserved.
You know, I guess, I guess in my family it's always been a classic.
But, you know, I'm starting to wonder because Captain Ron, but that movie placed him opposite opposite his long time in real life partner, Goldie Hawn.
Um And I think, I think people know him from overboard or would at least recognize that movie.
But he was also the voice and I did not piece this together till I was doing this.
He was a voice in The Fox and The Hound.
That really depressing Disney movie from the early eighties.
I'm assuming like a kid version of the Fox or the Hound.
Like the baby version.
It was, well, the movie is from the early 80s, so I don't know that he would have been a kid.
Oh, I didn't, I thought I was older than that.
Hm.
Ok.
We let her go.
Who was he?
I didn't write it down.
Ok.
It's been a long time since I've seen The Fox and The Hound because it's so depressing.
Fair enough.
Uh, my husband loved him in big trouble in Little China from 1986.
Right?
You talk about overboard.
I'm like, I feel like people probably are going to recognize that that more or like, um, like some of his action movies a little bit more, which is so weird because I don't know that I've ever seen all of Big Trouble in Little China.
I think he turned it on one time.
So, maybe not for me.
Kind of a weird movie.
I also didn't realize until I was putting this together that he was Elvis and Forrest Gump.
Maybe I knew it at some point in time.
But like, if you asked me for Kurt Russell's filmography, Elvis in Forrest Gump would not have been something that would have even popped on my radar.
Interesting.
It's not, I mean, it's not a huge credit, but Forrest Gump was a really big deal.
So, uh, more recently he's been in places like the Second Guardians of the Galaxy Movie.
He and Goldie Hawn are known for having one of the most beautiful Hollywood romances.
They've been together since about 1983 and although they've never married her Children from a previous marriage, Kate and Oliver Hudson consider him dad and Hahn and Russell did have one son together named Wyatt Russell who's a hockey player or was I think he may be an actor now also.
Tombstone.
Tombstone.
Yeah, I, I know you're not, you're not in on tombstone.
But I'm not, I don't even really like that genre of movies, but there are like three that I feel like everyone should have to see.
Tombstone is one of them.
Unforgiven is another.
I actually don't have a third.
It's just so.
And D and Captain Ron that is in my head all the time.
Now I'm like, what?
Deep.
Uh ok, so then we have Martin Schwartz.
I'm sorry, I did not mean to eclipse Kurt Russell.
Let me be very clear that I also think that Kurt Russell Russell Russell is a treasure and I really enjoy him in like everything I ever see him in.
Ok.
Um But Martin Short will always have a place in my heart because of jungle to jungle.
I don't think that's why I just love him.
I just think he has the most beautiful energy and like, um and we'll talk about it.
But like, I think that, like, he just, um he does not have a tarnished reputation.
Like, so many people, anything could happen more.
Um, but no, like, I mean, there's so many people that, like, I've looked up to over the years or like, been like, oh, I just really enjoy them as an entertainer.
And then you hear these things that just like, blow your mind and it's hard to look at them the same in quite the same light balancing that with the fact that we are talking about human beings that have real lives and do real things and they shouldn't be expected to be perfect.
That's ridiculous.
But anyways short has, um really had quite the resurgence in the last couple of years with only murders in the building.
I think you've watched some of that, um uh starring his, his bestie Steve Martin and Salina Gomez.
But we're talking about someone who's a comedian, a writer, an actor, a singer, apparently, which is something I didn't know whose showbiz career spans 50 years.
Um I mean, he's been around a long time.
He's an alum of second City in Toronto and S N L as well as beloved movies such as Three Amigos, Father of the Bride, a personal favorite of mine.
And of course, John.
Ok.
Oh, I'm really getting an idea of your movie library.
Um, you know, he had his own syndicated talk show.
He's nominated for a Tony for his work on Broadway and published a memoir in 20, in 2014.
So, I mean, he just has like a really expansive filmography, stage geography, all of those words that I don't know.
Like he's just, he's done it all.
He's an entertainer.
He's a consummate entertainer, a consummate entertainer, beautifully play.
So I assembled what I just thought were some really fun facts um to share about him.
So um you had mentioned kind of this uh bio sketch of some of our other stars.
He was born in Canada.
He was born there in 1950.
So him and Kurt Russell are almost the same age.
Canada must love him as much as many Americans do because he actually had uh they minted a coin in his honor back in 2013, which is kind of cool.
Um His dad was a stow away from Ireland and he was actually deported from Texas after arriving and that's how they settled in Canada.
So the US didn't work out and they worked it that way.
I don't know.
This is my dream.
Also, this is half ass internet research.
His first love was Gilda Radner.
They were together off and on for two years.
In the early seventies, he graduated mcmaster College in Ontario with a degree in social work.
Other mcmaster graduates.
I think you'll appreciate this.
Include Eugene Levy, John Candy and Dave Thomas Short and two of his closest friends.
I don't.
This is, this is a, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Dave Thomas, the Wendy's guy.
Yeah, I almost said not the Wendy's guy.
Um, he is a comedian and if I pulled up his picture you would recognize him.
Um, so we'll see about that.
We'll see about that.
Well, while you're doing your Googling, don't, don't miss out on this tidbit.
So uh Martin Short, Steve Martin and Tom Hanks gather at Martin's house every two years to enjoy some poker movies and laxatives.
During what short calls Colonoscopy Eve.
The group avoids solid foods.
Thanks to a nicely catered Feast of Jello and takes turns going to the bathroom.
Look, that's delightful.
Thank you.
I'm so glad that's your reaction because I don't know if this is real or not, but I literally can't imagine how funny this room is if it's true.
And I would love to be there.
So many good poop jokes.
I feel like I would get a colonoscopy just I'm not, yeah, I'm shy.
I don't have to be there yet.
Like I'm shy of the age.
You need it.
I'm also shy, but also of that you're not decided to stick your hand quarters up on a table and have them stick a camera in.
Let me tell you something to spend some time with those three would be worth it.
Bring it on it.
Yeah.
So, um, anyways and maybe it's something that we should keep in mind for future years.
They might have something, they might have something together.
I, I don't know.
Um, so he's known for being one of the kindest humans to ever work in show business despite going through some really tough losses, not trying to bring it down.
But I just want to show that like there's some level of resilience or something with this guy.
Um His brother died when he was 12.
Both of his parents had passed by the time he was 20 and his wife died after a long battle with cancer in 2010.
So as Rita Wilson put it, he isn't the best person at something.
He's just the best person, period.
And that is Martin Short.
That's it.
Goodbye.
Thank you, Martin Short.
You and Kurt Russell together are national treasures.
It's true.
I would say throw in Mary Kay Place and Benjamin Harvey and Meadow Sisto.
And you've got what I would call an all star cast.
Regrettably the rest of the world didn't agree with me.
This movie was not fully appreciated on its first outing.
Its budget was 24 million and it grossed about 22.5 million.
It was pretty much panned by critics scoring 26% on Rotten Tomatoes based on 23 reviews.
However, I found more than a few references to the cult following and resurgence in popularity that it's experienced over the years.
I expect to see Disney get a hold of this at some point.
I, I wouldn't be surprised.
This was a Disney movie originally Touchstone.
Well, it was originally intended to be Disney branded and then there were just like underage drinking and there were some references they were uncomfortable with.
So they moved it to Touchstone.
Oh, if they brought this back, I'd lose my mind.
I mean, I wouldn't be surprised they would look amazing.
Kurt Russell would still look great.
And I'm pretty, yeah, that would be great.
Um Sailors really love this movie and I found a bunch of like random and I think I referenced one later.
A bunch of like random sailor news outlets.
Does that mean it's accurate?
They just felt like the failing was very accurate.
Bear with me because I think I mentioned that later.
But yes, yes, I think this, this tracks with people's um experiences.
Uh And then the last thing I wanted to do in this section is some like trivia and I know you looked up some too.
So this is I I'm umbrella in this category as trivia, fun facts and random observations.
Yeah, let's see what you don't.
I that you are, you are right now and I, I don't want to take that from you.
So I've got a list of things but let's let you really uh get this uh ship sailing, um, as a tour and then like, if any of, if, if you didn't catch anything that I caught, I'll pipe in.
Ok.
Ok.
So, uh, like I said, I've seen this movie a billion times but when I looked on I M DB, they had some, like random trivia things that I never noticed before or never caught on to.
So for trivia, both of the cars that Captain Ron drives in the movie are missing a headlight on the same side as his missing eye.
What an amazing attention to detail.
Yeah, I saw that.
That's uh yeah, amazing attention to detail.
Bill thought much of Captain Ron's personal wardrobe came from Kurt Russell's closet and many of Ron's mannerisms including wearing the Speedo, wearing the Speedo the pirate, like raspy voice were all suggested by Russell.
His only objection was his encouragement of underage drinking, but he was persuaded when they told him it would fit the character.
So that's when he gets been to drink beer.
He says you're not going to touch my beer but you can go get your own.
I was a little surprised by that, that he was so off put by the underage drinking.
I don't know why, but like, I know maybe it's because I know some of the movies he's been in and I'm like, that's your objection.
Yeah.
Ok.
I wonder where his kids' ages fell at the time that he was recording this based on one of my movie trivia, I would say Youngish.
Yeah, I wonder if that's a different lens from some of the other movies he had done.
I don't know, probably, uh, he introduces himself as Ron Rico at the beginning of the movie, which is a brand of rum.
Uh, and I think an intentional, uh, nod to alcohol.
Can I add something in right then?
So, because I saw that one too.
And actually, for me, I was wondering if it was a hat tip to the fact that maybe there really isn't a Captain Ron.
Like we don't really know based on the end of the movie, you know, so I think like, you know, like as if his name had been um Jose Cuervo, it was his name for this um for this version of himself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um The script was written in mind for Chevy Chase to play Martin, Billy Crystal, Steve Martin, John Ritter, John Candy and Richard Dreyfuss were all considered for Martin as well.
Say all those names again.
Uh So it was originally written for Chevy Chase.
Billy Crystal Steve Martin, John Ritter John Candy and Richard Dreyfuss.
Richard Dreyfus.
Oh, you know what they gave him, what about Bob The Straight Man?
And they were like, here you go.
That was the only one I didn't have in mind.
Can I ask you a question?
Because when I ran across that trivia, I was wondering um could you see any of these other actors as Martin Short's part?
Or would you like to see?
Could you, would you, should you?
I love Chevy Chase.
I don't think this was the role for him.
Uh Steve Martin may may be.
This is a, that's a hard, that's a good question.
It's a hard one for me because it, it's, I've seen this movie, I know who's in it and it's hard for me to picture anyone else because that's his role.
I think Steve Martin could have really nailed it.
Um He has like a, a certain level of anxiety that he brings to a role that I think would have worked here because that was like the whole shebang of this movie, right?
You have this guy who's overlooked and unseen and maybe like, just caught at that time of your life where you feel like you're just going through the motions, you know.
Um And I do think he's supposed to be an anxious character.
I'm actually not sure that Martin short brings that anxiety to the character.
And then on the flip side at the end, you've got this guy who's ready for adventure, like he finally finds his footing, his confidence and all of that.
And um and there's something about when, especially if I think about like Steve Martin in like a parenthood role that I feel like he could have brought that energy really.
Well, not that I'm saying he should have and that it shouldn't have been Martin Short.
Just saying that's the one that stuck out in that crowd for me.
I think, I agree with you.
I think the flip question is, could you imagine Kurt Russell playing that character, Martin Harvey?
So, look, so this is the thing, right?
I'm, can we go ahead and break that trivia?
You?
Ok.
Why don't you tell the people?
Originally the movie was cast?
So Martin Short would play Captain Ron and Kurt Russell was gonna play Martin Harvey, but they got drunk one night and switched roles and it stuck that they flipped roles.
Well, let me ask, why don't you tell us first?
Because you're the, you're the expert of Captain Ron.
Can you see it that way and why or why not?
I have trouble seeing Kurt Russell playing Martin Harvey.
I don't have any trouble at all seeing Martin Short playing Captain Ron.
Um, he would play a different version of Captain Ron.
So I found Captain Ron to be like, um, like when he meets up with Clarice, he's like this liar.
And that's sort of how I saw him as this very like, manly man.
I love Martin Short.
That's not the character I would see him as I would see him more as a goofy.
Like he would definitely and would have had a peg leg.
He would have had a peg leg and it would have like we wouldn't have even and they said they considered giving um Kurt Russell a peg leg in addition to the eye thing, but they felt like in an already ridiculous movie, that was an extra level of ridiculousness they weren't prepared for.
So, but I could see if Martin Short had been in that role, they would have had to give him a peg leg and he would have been like you said, jazz hand shenanigans the whole time, so I could see it that way.
So they said that this happened after a night of drinking that they decided to switch roles.
This is what the screenwriter said.
And so like, also I'm like, this is obviously, to me, this feels like an obvious joke, like movie tanks and they're like, well, you know, we were gonna have it the other way and then we just, it feels like something I would do honestly, you know, just so I kind of like screw with people a little bit.
So who knows if it's real or not?
My thought on the whole thing was like, um I was reading in some of the criticism and it came from short playing like what's called in comedy, the Straight, the Straight Man or whatever.
And so I feel like we have to be careful with that term now because it could be taken like, like meaning heterosexual and that's not what we mean at all.
So, although he was that, yes, that's true.
Um That's correct.
Um But versus like a more eccentric character.
Like, I think we're all so used to seeing Martin short play and I do see that.
Not that I don't think it works as is, I totally think it worked as is, but I'm also not sure that the best version of this movie isn't the other way around.
Really?
I kind of would see Kurt Russell as Martin Harvey or not.
First of all, I think he could totally play that straight character.
Very easy because Kurt Russell, I am like, not that you don't see, like it's funny, my reaction was a little different than yours because like, I Kurt Russell plays a lot of serious roles so I can see him playing serious.
What I'm having a little trouble with is like, I think you're right and what you said helped a lot.
What I was struggling with was like, Captain Ron is also supposed to be sexy and Martin Short is many things, but I just don't think that he, he's not Kurt Russell, right?
They're two different kinds of whatever.
And so I'm one, but also I started to think it could be funny to see some of that like behavior where he's like kind of hitting on the wife and kind of hitting on the daughter.
But see that energy come from Martin short, like, I think that would have had its own um flavor of hilarity, right?
So maybe that's what they should do when they remake it.
See the only problem I have with it is I hear you.
Kurt Russell does play a lot of serious roles and it's not the seriousness.
I don't think he could do.
It's more the thing you mentioned a minute ago about that, like borderline anxiety, like that feeling of just you have this like anxious energy emanating from um from Martin Short and I agree with you.
I think Steve Martin would play that really, really?
Well, I don't know that I could see that coming from Kurt Russell.
So it would just be a little bit of a rebrand of the character.
Like I could see him playing maybe a little uptight, maybe a little by the book, but not that anxious energy that I really feel like came from the beginning.
So, I mean, I watch it if they want to redo it with those same two people just flipped, I'd watch it that I would, I would rewatch for sure.
Um So this is where I told you just pause for the cause for a second because you asked, is it um is this movie like realistic to sailors?
Um So I wanted to share that this movie is based on a real life experience that the writer John Dwyer had growing up um in the sixties, his father bought a boat in Fort Lauderdale and then commissioned a captain to help them skipper it back to, to Texas.
Um And what I found that his name was captain Ron and like the movie, Ron, their captain had one eye but also a peg leg which as I said, they felt was too on the nose for the film.
He was also drunk so much.
They called him Ron Rico and then passage maker dot com, which is one of those like nautical magazines I was talking about says during the trip to Texas, all the boat's electronics failed, the electrical system experienced multiple failures and Ron managed to get lost on the intracoastal waterway during a stormy passage in the Gulf Gulf of Mexico.
The Dwyer family feared for their lives in heavy seas.
Ron tried to seduce Dwyer's mother at one point, Dwyer's father threatened to throw Ron overboard.
So God, we basically watched this man.
one.
Do you ever hear things like that?
And you're like, my life is incredibly boring, you know, you know, it's kind of like almost famous because that was also based on what's his face's um expe Cameron Crow's experience like he is the young kid from that movie.
Like he literally went out, I think with Cream maybe, you know, or something, some band of that kind of banner from the sixties, seventies and seventies.
And um and then he turns it into a screenplay 25, 30 years later and we get to see what we get to see.
Um There's some connection Han's daughter that's her like uh not her debut role, but it's what launches her kind of, yeah, and um not just almost famous, but really famous.
Um But yeah, so, and, but I hear things like that and I'm like, this is why I can't write a movie.
They say reality is stranger than fiction.
Yeah.
So you just got to keep your eyes open.
So my one last thing in this sort of like umbrella category, I had one random observation.
I just could not let, let pass by.
We got a Dollywood reference because we're a Southern podcast.
I had to mention um that uh Martin asked Ron if he had been to Disney World too many times.
And Ron was like, oh, I know Disney World, I've been to Dollywood before and I just thought that was a funny reference.
It was very, it was very cute and it was in mine too because like, you know, so what we, what you said, yeah, we're here for Dolly, we're all here for Dolly.
Uh I only have one that you did not cover, uh which goes back to you asking about like, how old were their kids around this time?
And that's from, I found a role recall article where Kurt Russell was looking back at different characters he played and they snuck in into Captain Ron.
So, um but what he said is like his family was there, Martin Schwarz family um also came down and they all hung out and became friends on that movie set.
Um And it makes me think about Adam Sandler who just the last, I don't know, 15, 20 years of his career has been like, I'd really like to go to this place and I'm going to put all my friends in the movie and then we're just going to hang out and maybe we'll get paid a little bit for it, go party.
Which is why I'm like, Adam Sandler.
Maybe I'm a good hang.
We're fun, Adam I like, I'm not a good hang, but we're fun and we're looking for fun life experiences to write movies about.
That's right, whatever it takes.
And it also had me thinking maybe we should start a South Pacific podcast because everyone knows on location podcasts are very important.
So run that by Kyle.
OK.
And let's see how it goes.
This would, this would be a much better episode if we had the ocean in the background.
Yeah, because me going, it's just really not, it's not doing it right.
No offense.
Um OK.
So let's, let's find out reactions.
Are you, are you?
It's obvious what my reaction to this movie is.
I love it.
I love it.
I still own it on DVD to this day.
Kyle just went through all our DVD.
Si don't know if I told you this part when you mentioned where, where do you get it from?
He just went through all his DVD S the other day and there were like five that I just could not get rid of.
Captain Ron is one of them and I own it on digital.
I just can't get rid of it.
I classic for me.
I understand.
That's how I feel about, uh, like some V H S s that I can't get rid of.
I have a couple of those too.
I have no way to play them, but I have them.
Right.
I just need it.
Just, it's like a security blanket.
That's absolutely right.
I just took that right out of my mouth.
Um, so let's, let's get your hot take.
Let's see what you thought about it.
And then I had a rating scale for us to, to play through like a regular episode.
Well, the first thing I want to know is like, do you think I liked it?
I think you loved it.
You, you'd watch it over and over again?
Ok.
Willing it into existence.
Ok.
No, I think you, I think you thought it was better.
You thought it was better than Howard the Duck and you might be compelled to rewatch it.
Ok.
All right.
So, so here's the deal.
I, I, as I was like, here's the dill pickle as I was like, looking through, I was now I have to organize my thoughts the same way we do design women episodes.
So I'm just gonna go ahead and tell you that I had to put it into general reactions and straight observations, but let's rip off this Band Aid.
I was really nervous going into this one because I did think I was gonna be in another Howard the duck debacle.
And, um, you know, I can't do that again.
I can't go there again.
But honestly, I think this was a really cute movie almost from the very beginning.
You know, I found myself at least interested.
Uh, it was that opening music.
Well, I, I, I'll get there, I'll get there.
I think on balance with me thinking it was very cute with the exception of the uh gorilla, not gorilla passengers and the pirates.
It was pretty predictable.
Um, a little cliche, but I also think that's totally acceptable for this kind of movie.
Like, I don't need that.
Wow Factor.
It's not supposed to be like, it's not an Oscar contender and every movie doesn't need to be an Oscar contender.
You need this kind of movie to like zone and just be so you're right.
Yeah, great.
Um, I don't have to throw your computer out of the window to carry on.
Good.
Um, so, but circling back to what you were saying in, if it got me from the very beginning, honestly, I want to spend more time with their family in Chicago.
I actually like the Chicago piece the best out of the entire movie.
Oh, funny.
It was giving me so much nostalgia for the 90s.
It also put me in that feeling of like the home alone kind of movie.
It felt like.
Yeah.
And I hate to say this because it is pretty trite.
But it, it really, I could feel the simplicity, relatively speaking of then versus now and it did feel like a return to simple at times.
And there was something about that like you eat a sandwich on my map and I'm like, that was good.
Who had the thoughtlessness to put food on the countertop?
And like now it's like um Instagram is brainwashing my child.
You know, she won't come out of a room anymore because she's on the tiktok, you know, I mean, so it's just, I don't know, it just felt simpler.
Um So those were my general reactions I can move into my strays unless you wanted to, you know, go for it.
Ok?
I wanna make sure I'm giving you everything you want out of this.
I've heard all I need to hear you enjoyed it.
Ok.
So, well, you may change your mind.
Gosh, darn it.
Captain Ron came off a little creepy through a 2022 lens.
I'm covering my eyes now because I first he came dangerously close to hitting on the daughter and then was fairly inappropriate with Catherine.
It's a lot of touching.
Um So, you know, I'm sure it was much more comedic and probably even somewhat charming in 1992 in 20.
I don't think it was ok.
It's all part of his character was like I, I mean, I think it was kind of supposed to be like that.
I think it's confusing though too because I think Kurt Russell is just super charismatic.
Yeah.
Um and I do think we, but I do think we used to give more leeway for that kind of action.
So I think today it's, I do think the reaction today feels a little bit more strongly than you're like, oh, that's just Captain Ron.
And today it's like, whoa buddy, chill out.
I just think it's a little different.
So that was my very first stray.
I'm gonna hold there in case there's something you want to say.
I'm processing because again, this is, it's hard for me to, it's really challenging, designing women.
I feel like I have a better, I have better success looking at it through 2022 lens because I didn't watch it in depth.
The first go round this movie, I've seen a billion times and I saw a billion times in 1994 56789.
But I feel like it's always been sort of like, oh this guy, oh this guy, he's, he's, he's something different, you know, like um definitely not like holding him accountable for almost hitting on a 17 year old, but like that's not cool.
Like, but that's who he is.
He was, he was only 50.
I mean, the age gap is like nil, yeah, I don't know.
I got to think about that one.
Yeah.
Well, just this gal's first.
I thought it was so funny but, like, it didn't bother me.
It's not like I was like, oh, I need a security blanket.
It was just like, huh, on Rewatch.
It's definitely, you definitely cringe when he does that and you're just like, it's sort of like watching the movie through your fingers.
You're like, oh my God, he's really doing this and, yeah, Martin Short didn't have as aggressive of reaction as you would expect.
No, I think that's kind of the character.
They were right.
You have to watch it again now.
So to Catherine, um I hope this isn't inappropriate.
I don't know.
Was that a nip slip in the shower?
I feel like I accidentally saw a nipple and I was wondering if that was the partial nudity?
Oh, I don't, I don't remember because I was watching it.
I was like, did I just see her nipple?
Um That is a scene when I was a kid we'd have to watch with our eyes covered.
So it was, it did feel very, especially with like Martin short in the mix.
I was like, oh, I can't, oh God, I think I was watching it through closed fingers.
You know, I was like, uh um I mean, and again, like, I'm just gonna remind people I watched Game of Thrones.
So it's not like I don't watch nudity.
It was just, it was a little surprising in this movie, it was full body nudity out of nowhere.
Like you're watching this quirky silly funny movie and then all of a sudden they're naked in a shower because they're definitely going in there to have sex.
So, um, this is also why it wasn't branded as a Disney movie.
Right.
Right.
So, anyways, I didn't know if, like I had imagined it.
Well, I've never, I don't think you'll go back just for the nipple.
That's the name of my podcast.
Mickey may not attend that one.
Is it going back just for the nipple or just for the nipple?
Just for the nipple?
Ok.
Yeah.
Um You know, you gotta really gotta draw people in with something crisp.
Um So I, I think uh I, I almost want to separate these two thoughts because I wanna, I want to be away from the nipple to, but I, I still want to talk about her for a second because I, I need to say that I have only seen her in roles where she's a little older.
So like she's playing the surgeon general on West Wing or she's an F L D F wife on Big Love.
So she's just covered from, from every end in clothing from cheek to cheek, only see her eyes.
Um And so, and then in this, she's like in all these tiny Caribbean outfits and I just want to give this lady her do.
She's got a super cute figure.
She's so beautiful.
Yeah, she's very beautiful and just like the cutest figure.
It's so funny.
Now I'm creepy and I've thought this, as long as I can remember watching this movie, her body did not look significantly different than Meadow sis's body in terms of like a mother, daughter.
Like what I expect a mother, her daughter to be was not that and, and I didn't, I, I think it's amazing.
Yeah, I think it was amazing and I'm so glad that they let her dress like that and they let her be attractive and beautiful and in a bikini in the Caribbean because the instinct is to put moms in Scots.
And I think it's also awesome.
And I think also that, like, just thinking about, um, I, I forgot about the mash thing and her writing and, and, and, and doing all those things behind the scenes.
And so I, I just think it's cool.
Like I don't, it's so difficult being a woman because on the one hand, I'm like, you should not be expected to be some sort of glam foxy, whatever.
And also do you know, be a doctor and play the harp in your spare time, but also be able to make an amazing cheesecake.
And, you know, I feel like we expect too much.
But also sometimes it's really cool when you see someone that's that beautiful.
And then also like, they've really got something going on between their ears.
I hope that's ok to say.
Um, a couple of other stray observations just that going back to you taking us on the tour of where we went.
Cool scenery being in the Caribbean and all.
I actually really liked that boat a lot.
The woodwork was really cool.
It was like making me think about Peter Pan and other Disney movies.
So I think it shows like, probably they had some of this either already filmed or something was going on before they made the change to Touchstone.
Um because it felt like, you know, I mean, the Disney references, the Pirates of the Caribbean references.
Um I also really loved the crash plane turned into the little restaurant.
It was cute and I was like this like random island.
How realistic is that?
But I love it and I want, I want to find that but maybe it is kind of realistic.
How do they get hamburgers?
Uh Yeah.
Well, because how fresh are they?
Oh, how fresh, super fresh, the freshest I have questions.
Yeah.
Um I would, I would give it a shot.
Uh The other uh I wanted to give a, a kind of maybe a book end or just an addendum to the Dollywood reference.
But uh so Kurt Russell saying he's never been to Disney World, but he has been to Dollywood.
So apparently that's a joke that was snuck in there because Kurt Russell starred in a lot of Disney movies as a child.
Yeah.
So I thought that was an interesting aside, uh, funny to hear them talk about Pirates of the Caribbean.
So this is 11 years before the Blockbuster size franchise.
Um, and to hear them just reference it as a Disney Ride is kind of funny because that movie has a long shadow and legacy now of its own.
And then this is not strong enough to be a dislike.
There's just something about this weird trope in the 90s and I still see it pop up in places now, whether that has to do with teen daughters in this way that they're portrayed in like a little bit of an unflattering light.
I feel like they're always on the precipice of losing their virginity and, or they're like oversexed and, or like constantly flatting flaunting themselves in like overly sexy clothes and it feels like this movie was teetering into that a little bit.
They're always doing something inappropriate or stupid, you know.
And, uh, I was trying to think of some other examples um, in what came to mind for me immediately was Kelly from marrying my Children just thinking about her, uh, a young Katherine Heigl and my father, the hero did some diving because I was like, I know there are some other ones and it was like, all she could think about, she just, she just want to get laid, you know, and then, and I'm not saying that doesn't happen for young women it just feels like we make them very one note in this time period.
And then there's also this other offshoot of it.
That's like the whole FM fatal thing with like Drew Barrymore and Poison Ivy.
Then Alyssa Milano is poison Ivy and then whoever else we made poison Ivy, you know, and it just, it feels a little unfair to young women.
Um, almost the way that we always, the, the, the teen sons always made some dork, you know.
So I know like it happens because you're just like trying to create these characters.
You want like a family and you got to be quick about it, I guess.
And you wanted to be able to see some sort of growth through this movie.
There needed to be some lesson they learned or whatever.
I feel like if this movie were made today, Ben would have been on his like video game console the whole time and she would have been like head deep in Tik Tok or she would have been an influencer or something and they would have broken up with their devices by the time they got back to Miami or whatever.
I'm sure so.
Well, something for them to keep in mind for the next iteration and please consult me because I have thoughts.
Uh let's read it like we do.
Um We're gonna do it on a scale of 1 to 10 gorillas, not gorillas.
OK.
So I have a question.
A clarifying question about the context of the scale.
Are we talking about one as in one being the best uh or 10 being the best movie ever?
And one being like the worst movie ever or are we just talking in like the most general of terms?
Like one being generally a terrible movie and 10 being generally a fantastic movie, I would say approach it the same way you approach rating the episodes of designing women.
So I don't know.
And I'm comparing it to other episodes, which means I'm bringing, I'm gonna be comparing it to other movies.
Let's just say it this way.
If I'm thinking in the universe of movies, then my answer is four.
If I'm just talking about generally, then my answer is five, maybe six.
And if you rated it on par with other early to mid nineties comedies, six, it's a solid 10 for me.
I have no doubt.
All right, let's talk.
Winners and losers Salina, who slathered on your sunscreen and who gave you seasickness?
Uh I actually feel like there was like a lot of winners in this one.
Yeah.
Well, so like when you said at the top, like it ends with like fuzzy feelings.
I mean, it does.
So my first winner is Martin.
I think he had the most growth we talked about this to some extent, like he really comes into his own by the end of the movie, he was able to become the captain of the boat and the captain of his own destiny.
That's nice.
You know.
So, winner.
Number one.
Ok.
Number two, the entire Harvey family, they chose adventure and each other over monotony.
And this experience brings them closer together and certainly closer than they were when they first set sell.
So that's my second choice.
And then third is Captain Ron.
He's like just generally this happy guy.
And while he may be a con man, it's unclear, it's unclear.
Um He's also somehow bringing families closer together and perhaps some kind of low key hero.
So, yeah, another winner and then the loser of the pirates.
Uh You know, I mean, it's an obvious answer but they were outwitted by four land lovers.
Oh, good call.
Who've been only sailing for a handful of weeks?
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, that's true.
That's fine.
Um I listed Catherine as my winner.
Mostly this was really challenging for me because I just think everybody's a winner in this movie, winner for you, a winner for you, winner for you.
The whole movie is a winner.
You know what I mean?
You were here, you pirates.
But Catherine stayed levelheaded regardless of everything.
Like, don't you think she was like alarmingly calm the entire movie?
She's like, calm down Martin.
He just like gave our kids guns, you know, like she just was fine about everything and I just appreciated that we needed that level of like even Kness through the entire movie, sort of even killed thing, sort of a winner for me and then my loser, I just really hate that yacht broker from the beginning.
Um Paul Paul, I think he's played by Paul A.
Uh, and I just really hate that guy.
We really missed that in the trivia, which is a nice Gilmore Girls connection by the way.
And there was also something, um, one of the songs in the movie is done by him and it plays like right before I wish I had written that one down.
It plays like right before he comes out.
So Paul in is like a hidden Easter egg in the movie.
He is, I actually, you know, one person I almost wrote down as a, as a loser loser.
Yeah.
Um was at the very beginning, the guy who was kind of like um being really rude to Martin short in the elevator, Martin shoot.
Um and he's just kind of ribbon ribbon him a little bit about like writing something or I don't know.
Anyways, he, he played Kenny on the show Frazier.
There was actually a couple of uh main Frasier characters that showed up in the movie that caught my attention.
Bulldog and the station manager and he was a loser for me too.
OK, I was just looking it up because when you said for me to Google um Dave Thomas, not Wendy's.
Dave Thomas.
I was just wondering for whatever reason.
It flashed in my head.
I was like, was that him?
Oh, yeah.
No, but I could, they're of similar ilk.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Ok.
So the ultimate, the final, ultimate test I'll ask you, is this a rewatch or a reject?
I mean, is this, is this the ultimate test for, for me and your friendship or is this the no stress?
So, I, I'm gonna tell you this.
It's, I, I, I don't know, it's either for me.
Ok.
I certainly would not reject it, but to be honest, I'm probably not gonna rewatch it.
Like, only because you rented it and you don't own it now.
That yes, that's why.
But hear me out if I had watched this when I was younger, like I probably would feel very differently.
I don't have the same attachment as you do.
Case in point.
Have you ever seen the movie?
Willow?
Ok.
This is a movie with, um, this is a movie that meant a lot to me growing up.
I loved it.
It's great.
They're actually one of the reasons I said you'll probably get the chance to watch Captain Ron on Disney Plus is because Willow is being made into like a 10 part series.
Ok.
And this was a movie from the late eighties, I wanna say loved it.
I could sit down and watch it right now and I would enjoy it.
Is it because it's the most amazing movie or is it because I have nostalgia in my heart for it.
Probably more because I have nostalgia in my heart for it.
So it's similar to that I got it like, but if you sat down and watched it today, you probably try and kill me afterwards.
Probably so.
Yeah.
So folks, are you enjoying our movie reviews or is there something that you think we need to review next?
Let us know, you know how to find us or you will again shortly when I run through the myriad of ways.
Also, it's your turn, Nikki, it's your turn next time.
If the people will it to be Machiavellian, if the people will it to be Jedi mind?
No, we're not putting it in the people's hands again.
We have to, I feel like Doc Hollywood, can you, you never, you never seen it?
I was really upset.
I was really hoping that one would win out.
Ok.
So we may uh just, just like you said, we're not putting it to people next time.
Salina already said that she doesn't love the way you guys think we might need to do it because it really is a perfect dove tail for the show.
Like this is totally random.
The only dovetail to there was a connection Mary place.
Um But there's really no connection to our podcast.
But Doc Hollywood is like in our wheelhouse.
It is totally in our wheelhouse.
It is an enjoyable movie.
I have nostalgia for it, but I feel like you also will enjoy it.
It's enjoyable and there's a lot of stuff we could talk about.
Yeah, I can, I can tell it's one that I would really have gone for.
So I think I was a little let down by that also.
Like Thelma and Louise is a fantastic movie.
And if you think you've seen it, you have not seen it and you need to go watch Thelma and Louise, put your big girl pants on and go watch Thelma and Louise everyone because it is a very important movie.
That's all I'll say there.
It didn't sound like judging from our patreons reaction, it did not sound like it's something that everybody loves.
I'm trying to find real quick.
I'm trying to pull up the post where, um, Teresa Gregory says, Block Thelma and Louise.
I don't trust Teresa's taste in movies.
I think Theresa Poly Shore.
So I, I told you y'all have the exact same, not so great taste.
And you're lucky.
I didn't make you watch, um, Son in law son-in-law.
This is like I am due to watch it in the next couple of days.
It's my Thanksgiving tradition.
You are so lucky.
I'm not making you watch that.
I agree.
I love Poly Shore, Polly Shore.
If you hear this, you're a delight and Salina doesn't appreciate you don't come on the podcast, please come on the podcast.
I would talk to you all day.
I still talk to you.
He is so um his life story, like I would just love to talk to him about his life.
He's seen some stuff good and bad.
Yeah.
Anyway, so son-in-law next season.
Oh, sorry, that's not where we were, son in law.
I can't believe I'm saying it.
But coming at you soon, sweet Tea and T V's take on designing women season four.
Holy moly.
We love everyone to follow along with us and engage.
I'm doing my best, Nikki.
We're flipping the script today.
You can find us on Instagram and Facebook at sweet tea and TV, email sweet tea TV pod at gmail dot com or message us from our website at W W W dot sweet tea TV dot com.
We also accept carrier pigeons.
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Tell your friends, we don't even have to know about it.
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Huh?
Rate and review us.
That is an excellent free way to engage with us and help us.
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Also, I hear a good movie.
So email us D M us, contact us from the website.
We're very findable and thank you for joining us for another.
I'm sorry.
Is this what I sound like every week?
No, I think this is my interpretation.
I feel like I'm being sold Tupperware.
Thank you for joining us for another season of Sweet Tea and TV.
And heads up guys, we're taking a break for the holidays for the holidays, but we'll be back in the new year.
So if you're new to the show, this is the perfect time to catch up or go relisten.
I'm sure it's wonderful on the second.
Listen, we listen to it a few times so that there are less mistakes in it for now.
Stick around for a special edition of Grits Blitz.
It's gonna be nautical y'all.
So you know what that means by now, don't you?
What does it mean?
Salina?
We'll see you on this.
Oh, oh my God.
I was not prepared for that and welcome to a special edition of Gritz Blitz.
So Gran Splitters.
Oh, no, I see it now, I see that comment where you said, but if you think this is cheesy, we can scrap the whole thing.
I see where it was coming from now.
Oh, you walked the plane.
I'm just kidding.
Ok.
According to Cruise Seekers International.
So, so there may be some typos in the article.
Don't worry about it.
Many phrases that have been adopted into everyday use originate from sea faring in particular from the days of sale.
I out of the yard.
I'm sorry, I don't know.
I don't get to, I don't get, you don't, it's not really appropriate to imitate accents.
Right.
So this feels like the one place where I can really lean in.
I say, go for it.
Have fun.
So hop aboard Y Lovers for today we test Nikki's nautical knowledge.
Can she guess which phrases are nautical by nature?
You know, she's cracked herself up.
Nikki.
I'm going to say a term or a phrase and you'll tell me nautical or not.
These are like the only games I can do not a cool or not equal or not K N O T as in the measure, you know, I don't know that is this now common phrase did or did not originate on the sea, you get two points if you don't need a definition, one, if you do, obviously, the definition may not be real.
So bear that in mind.
Do we want steaks?
S T A K E si have a few in mind for you.
Sure.
Yeah.
All right.
So let's do something with a twist if you get a majority, right?
You're sending me on a cruise.
Let's break into my espresso advent calendar early.
Oh, sorry, you, hey, if you can come up with something better, we'll talk about it in nature.
I cannot afford you cruise.
All right.
If you get a majority wrong.
You can also, if you come up with something else, you let me know we'll try it on precise.
Ok.
We might be able to work that out if you get a majority wrong.
You get to sing a Christmas song to take us out of the episode.
Don't worry, I've looked up some that you can sing without threat of a law repercussion.
What do you think?
Sounds good.
Ok.
That sounds good.
Ok.
All right.
I'm nervous then.
That's what it is.
I don't sing.
Well, I find that hard to believe.
Chuck a block.
Is it nautical or is it not?
It is nautical?
Ok.
Do you wanna hear the definition?
No man, because I lose points if I do.
No, no, no.
If you make your choice and then you can or cannot.
Oh, ok.
Well, definitely.
If it's not gonna be, you're choosing nautical.
Yes, you are correct.
Here's the definition according to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah dot com.
A block and tackle is a pulley system used on selling ships to hoist the sales.
The phrase describes what occurs when the system is raised to its fullest extent when there is no more rope free and the blocks jam tightly together.
Predictably this led to its current meaning cram so tightly together as to prevent movement.
I love the word cram.
All right.
So I got two points, right?
Should I be keeping score?
Yeah.
Keep score.
Ok.
No 2.
Get the ball rolling, nautical or not get the ball rolling and just remember you can have the definition if you so deem it that you want the definition, get the ball rolling so well spoken.
You know what I'm gonna say?
You can still have the definition.
Oh, it's hard when you want to chase down those two points.
It is, it is, it is.
Ok.
Give me the definition.
Ship, cannons were notoriously unreliable for many reasons from coming loose on the deck of a pitching, rolling and yawing deck to faulty projectiles to get the ball rolling, signaled a good start.
And well working cannon today, the phrase has morphed into common workplace jargon.
And so you're saying you could be lying to me, any definition could be true any day.
I don't think it's not a cool, you don't think it's not a cool.
I don't, but can you tell me what you thought of that definition?
That's a good definition because I wrote it.
Yeah, it sounded, it was believable.
I was torn between whether it had something to do with cannons or like bullets or if it had something to do with like the poly lever system.
And is there like a red, there's a, in my mind it's a red ball that goes up and it was just like that, that all seems fake to me.
Ok.
So you have three points, three points.
So I only get one point since I got the definition?
Ok.
Ok.
Filibuster, nautical or not, Filibuster, I'm also looking Nikki and enunciating really strongly.
It's feeling aggressive now.
Yes, it's nautical in nature.
That is correct.
Oh, thank God.
Do you want to hear the answer?
Yes.
I mean, the definition, I'm feeling like it has something to do with like sea battles.
Buccaneers were sometimes known in England as Filibusters from the Dutch for or translated into French.
Filibuster.
Filibuster.
It is now used as a political term, meaning to delay or obstruct the passage of legislation as opposed to sailing vessels by nonstop speech making.
I'm gonna tell you are their definitions.
True.
I don't know that I'm just doing the best you can with what you got.
I'm just doing exactly that.
So there's that the next one to land and expand nautical or not.
I have never heard of that to land and expand.
You had heard a choa block.
Uh I've never heard of that.
You've never heard someone say like this cup is chock a block full of hot coffee.
Oh, I've heard him say chock full.
Oh yeah.
Choa blocks.
Ok.
Now you've, you've distracted.
This is, this is part, she calls me the mastermind to land and expand nautical or not.
Are you Googling?
No, I'm looking at my points.
I'm looking at my points.
I'm thinking about what the last one I'm not gonna tell you all my secrets.
Uh Yes, it's nautical in nature.
It is not, not a talking.
I knew it.
Can I give you the definition?
Yes, please.
I made this up.
Ok.
Seafaring was a particularly dangerous endeavor and unfortunately many sailors died at sea captains would sometimes need to recruit large numbers to replace men.
Once returning to port today, it means to sell a small solution to a client with the goal of later convincing the client to expand their purchase.
Last part is true.
That last part is true.
Ok, because then I started wondering, is this even a real term?
I've never heard of land and expanded.
So now I'm just treating it like it's real, but it really is.
Yeah.
Ok.
Would you think?
Not?
Not, I'm like, I just want to know, what did you think of my definition?
It was good.
I would have believed it.
What that would have made me say it was not a, what's that game?
Um, where you make up?
Oh, I know what you're talking about.
I love that game.
I can't remember the Balderdash, Balderdash blooper or something.
That's one of the very few games that I've ever liked.
I think it's a good, all right.
You've got three more.
Are you ready?
Holy crap.
Ok.
Yeah.
Sorry, I can speed it up.
I got zero points.
No, I just wanna, I wanna, I want points.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Fits the bill.
Yes.
That's nautical in nature.
Nautical or not.
Yes, that's not my nature.
All right.
Do you wanna, you are correct.
Do you wanna hear the definition?
I do.
A bill of lading was signed by the ship's master, acknowledging receipt of specified goods and the promise to deliver them to their destination.
In the same condition upon delivery, the goods were checked against the bill to see if it was all in order.
If so they fit the bill.
Ok.
There you go.
I found it.
I would, I would, I, we should link to this because I was amazed by all the terms in there.
I just picked some that I thought like might work for this segment.
But what is that about?
Like, I don't feel like there was that much sea faring going on like of course, at one point in time, it was the only way to travel but, but it was such a dangerous way.
Like were there that many people on the high seas?
I don't know.
And if there were, why did it take so long to discover certain areas they kept getting lost by Captain Ron Jesus is in the offing nautical or not in the offing?
Uh Can I hear your definition?
You absolutely can hear a definition.
Is it mine?
Is it the only time we'll tell?
No, this phrase is quite simple to understand once you know that the offing is the part of the sea that can be seen from land, excluding those parts that are near the shore.
Early texts also refer to it as an orphan O F F E N or often O F F I N A ship that was about to arrive was in the offing therefore imminent, which is how the phrase is used today.
I'm going to say it's nautical in nature or nautical in like roots.
And if it's not, then you just slap me across the face with that definition because that sounds real.
That's right.
Ladies and gentlemen, I wrote that definition.
That sounds real.
That's correct.
It is not a I was like one point if I am wrong, then that was the best written definition I've ever heard in my life.
Dang it.
I want to be the best written definition that you've ever, you got to come up with words like often and then spell it multiple ways.
I mean, I would give it a go.
I was gonna say it was real before you even read the definition.
So now I'm just annoyed that I lost a point by hearing that stupid definition that stupid not well written definition.
That wasn't yours.
That's right because mine would be wonderful.
Um ok, so the very last one is son of a gun.
Is it nautical or is it not a son of a gun?
No, incorrect.
Damn.
The answer is that it is nautical.
Ok.
When in port and with the crew restricted to the ship for any extended period of time, wives and ladies of easy virtue.
I did not write this often were allowed to live aboard along with the crew infrequently but not uncommonly, Children were born aboard and a convenient place in for this was between guns on the gun deck.
If the child's father was unknown, they were entered into the ship's log as son of a gun.
Probably a sanitized version of you guessed it, son of a bee.
Despite the various folk etymologies.
What?
That's crazy.
There's just all these women laid up between the guns delivering babies and then dads like maybe not owning them.
I want to go back to something I said in the beginning these feel like Skela wags to mere Seekers International, but I feel like maybe that is right.
I could see that happening although like at some point in time, wasn't it like bad luck to have women aboard?
That sounds right.
And not if there are ladies of easy virtue.
That's good luck.
Nine months pregnant.
I don't know, man.
That's crazy.
So what, what was the score I was aiming for?
I got you eight points.
You got uh you needed to get a majority, right?
So don't worry about the the point system actually didn't matter.
1234567.
There were seven.
And how many did you get?
Right.
Five.
That's in, in some version I got five, right?
We're gonna break up that Advent Calendar, right?
So you don't have to sing a Christmas song unless you want to.
Did you want to sing.
What were my options?
Uh, Christmas songs.
Not under copyright or your options?
Well, I'm not singing four minutes of it.
I can do 10 seconds.
No, you should.
Yeah, we'll have you sing us out with, um, away in a manger deck.
The halls, jingle bells feels good because that's not, you don't think you don't think I mom just yelled at me and made me cry all over town.
You don't think that I didn't write something to take us out?
Oh OK.
Good.
And then at the end of that, you can wrap us up with jingle bells.
OK.
Probably not.
Jingle bell rocks.
I assume that one is copyright not if I don't know the words don't run afoul of the copyright law if it's indistinguishable because I can't keep in tune and I can't carry a tune, then it doesn't count well.
Or you could.
Is it different enough?
Like if you sing jingle bell croc.
Yes.
To the crock pot.
Yes.
Yeah.
So there might be something there.
So be thinking on that while here at this.
Excellent altro.
OK.
All right.
All right, y'all.
It's time for these two Southern ladies to set sail.
We wish you a merry Christmas.
A happy Hanukkah, a joyous Kwanza Feli Navidad, whatever you celebrate.
May this season be filled with joy, merriment, love and celebration.
And what we're trying to say is happy holidays.
Y'all see you in 2023.
We wish you a merry jingle.
Bell Rock.
We wish you a merry jingle.
Bell Rock.
We wish you a merry jingle.
Bell Rock and jingle all the way Dr Hall.
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